BLESSED MESSAGES FROM THE TERMINALLY ARCANE
Alas, my horn had betrayed me
as the Buttocks Of Charity approached,
and there ushered forth
a sound as pure as static.
I tuned wildly, madly
but clarity came and went
like the throb through
a swollen vein.
Weight bearing appendages,
I appeal to thee.
Do not forsake me now
as I attempt to shift positions
propped up against this mahogany bar.
Regrettably, I have only one good side
and it is currently unapproachable.